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四十年前退伍老兵补贴
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小贵前所未有地恨自己的公公！在大国怀里哭的时候，小贵告诉丈夫：我恨自己！恨自己让女儿生下来就是畸形，恨自己医不了女儿不得不把她送走，恨自己没有违抗公公把女儿早一点接回来。大国抱着妻子，哑着声音：&ldo;别恨自己，要恨恨我吧。&rdo;那天小贵哭了一夜。正月十五的时候，小贵给女儿裹上厚厚的大红羊绒大衣，跟大国一起带着她出去看冰灯。小南不愿意跟父母一起，他已经十六了，他更愿意跟自己的同学去玩，‐‐好几个女同学！小贵牢牢的牵着女儿的手，&ldo;闺女，咱们这儿虽然没有上海热闹，可是上海看不到冰灯。你要是喜欢，妈找人在咱们阳台上也弄一个好吗？你喜欢什么样儿的，那个兔子灯就挺好看的。&rdo;小西没有回答。小贵已经习惯了。小西不爱说话，你问她，她会回答，可是日子长了，小姑娘看出有时候她妈是在没话找话，可有可无的问题就不回答了。至于向小南那样一回家就说说学校里的事儿，说说老师同学，抱怨抱怨功课多什么的，小西从来没有过。她也没有和同学出去玩过，每天就是学校和家，学校的课余活动也不参加。上个学期，小西年级第四名，家长会小贵和大国一起去了，平生第一次参加女儿的家长会，两口子都不想错过，然后老师婉转地告诉他们：&ldo;姬姠西同学有一点孤僻。&rdo;回来的路上夫妻二人都没有说话。到了家，小西难得主动开口：&ldo;胡老师说我什么？&rdo;小贵都不知道怎么跟女儿说！憋了好一会儿：&ldo;你们老师说你学习好，还会画国画写毛笔。我跟她说你还会吹笛子呢，胡老师说让你多参加学校组织的活动。&rdo;&ldo;没兴趣。&rdo;小西回答：&ldo;批评的话呢？&rdo;小贵有点烦躁：&ldo;没有批评，你成绩那么好，老师干嘛批评你！你问这干嘛？&rdo;&ldo;知不足然后能自反。&rdo;小西很严肃，想了想加一句：&ldo;有则改之无则加勉。&rdo;小贵完全不知道该怎么接口。大国无奈得告诉女儿：&ldo;小西，你爷爷和大姑有没有教过你，和人相处也是一门学问。&rdo;小西茫然地看她爸妈。隔天她让她爸给她买几本人际关系的书，大国直接从书柜里找了一本大学教育心理学和一本格林童话给她，告诉她：&ldo;知行合一。&rdo;小西接了过去，然后跟她爸要求看他书柜里的书。大国告诉女儿：&ldo;想看哪本之前要先问过我，爸爸同意了才能看。&rdo;小西很开心。小贵对女儿几岁老爷子和大姑子就给她看聊斋、红楼梦背论语的事儿印象特深，她再喜欢读书人，也不想自己的女儿整天抱着书只知道书里的知识，现实里什么都不干什么都不懂，这是书呆子！小贵抱怨丈夫：&ldo;她十四都不到！读好学校里的书就行了，小姑娘家家，应该多说多笑爱玩爱跳，多穿点新鲜衣服在外面美！你让她整天坐在家里看书？！看得心思越来越重！&rdo;大国苦笑：&ldo;你能拦住她？&rdo;小贵不做声。可她觉得女儿小小的人不能这样。于是就拉着女儿逛街买衣服，把自己省吃俭用赚下的私房钱都拿来给女儿买新衣服，把小南看得直翻白眼。小西也没有多喜欢，平时穿得最多的还是校服。春节医院有活动，小贵也把女儿带上，还让女儿上台表演笛子、给叔叔阿姨写春联。看别人夸女儿多才多艺，小贵心里甭提多高兴了，嘴上还一个劲儿谦虚，&ldo;小丫头胡闹，上不了台面。&rdo;可一回到家，她高兴的劲儿还没过，一直不说话的小西当着她爸和她哥问：&ldo;妈妈，你是不是当我是戏子？！&rdo;小贵觉得兜头一盆冰水！小西问完就回自己房间了。小贵当着儿子就哭了。小南傻了，&ldo;妈，你把我妹怎么了？&rdo;小贵气急：&ldo;我是她亲妈！我能把她怎么了？！&rdo;小南往他爸身后缩‐‐他身高已经到他爸下巴了，比他爸壮实的多，正在蹿个儿长身体，有点小胖，‐‐从他爸肩上露出半拉脑袋，重新问他妈：&ldo;我妹把你怎么了？&rdo;小贵被儿子弄得哭笑不得。大国给了儿子一个赞赏的眼神，&ldo;臭小子，玩你的去。&rdo;小南伸手：&ldo;经费。&rdo;大国给了他五块钱，小南出去避难，&ldo;我去猴子家玩儿，晚上住那儿。&rdo;他一点儿也不想夹在他妈和他妹妹之间。

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