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他叹息,她便心软,恍惚间感叹道:&ldo;我总以为自己是死了的,像是灵魂出窍,已不在当下。&rdo;他一时沉寂,双双相顾无言,她想的是,其实他与她的情义再深比不过身家性命,她不能拖累他。而周沐,多日不见,他似乎已垂垂老矣,眼神浑浊而泥泞,光彩不再。他忽然间说:&ldo;顾小西,你了解吗?我总觉得你我不过神在梦境之中,所有的一切,皇帝,你母亲,贺兰将军,这整个时空不过是你的或者我的凭空臆造,等到梦醒,你还是你,我还是我,只不过一夜过去,闹铃大作,要急急忙忙上班上学。&rdo;她不说话,他便捏着她的手,紧张,继续说:&ldo;最重要的是我们,仍旧行走在梦境里但不自知的我们,该用什么方法让自己醒来。一旦醒来,梦里的一切全体灰飞烟灭,有谁能记得梦里经历过什么?没有人。只要我们能够醒来,顾小西,相信我,只要我们能够醒来,一切都将回到原点。&rdo;她忽然间警醒,迎上他狂热而急切的目光,问:&ldo;所以说?你想做什么?&rdo;&ldo;我们只需要一个契机。&rdo;他重复,&ldo;一个刺激性的契机。&rdo;她神情紧张,紧咬着下唇,不语。周沐亦是急躁,手上力道太重,令她疼得皱眉,&ldo;周沐,你究竟想要说什么?&rdo;&ldo;是死,顾小西,只要在梦里死去,就能够再回到现实。&rdo;&ldo;你‐‐‐‐&rdo;&ldo;我知道这听起来难以置信,但顾小西,你相信我,结束并不痛苦,请你一定相信我!&rdo;而她惊疑难定,&ldo;你要我相信你,然后呢?任由你杀死我?&rdo;他不认,辩解,&ldo;不不不,怎么会是杀死你?我在尽最大努力解救你,解救我们,你和我。再回到从前去不好么?不管我妈怎么阻拦,我们都排除万难在一起。&rdo;&ldo;周沐,你凭什么以为这一切不过虚幻梦境?你有没有想过,也许我们曾经生活的所谓现代文明,不过是你我大梦一场,现下才真真正正回到现实中来?如果是梦,是你的还是我的?如果是你与我共同的臆想,为什么会有这么多出其不意的令你我痛苦的挫折出现?其实你根本分不清现实存在与虚幻梦境,你不过是对当下不满,所以想要回到对你更有利的状况,方法是毫不留情地杀死我,对不对?&rdo;她的质问,他几乎无言以对,他的目光紧锁着她愤怒的脸孔,由羞愧到恼怒,他转眼间已变换姿态,勃然大怒,恨她到咬牙切齿,&ldo;顾小西,说到底你就是舍不得这里,舍不得即将到手的高位,根本不愿意跟我一起回去罢了?我问你,你真能这样狠心,就此不再管你的亲人朋友自己一个人快活?&rdo;她觉得累,周沐每每如此,无论开始如何,到最后一定将矛头指向她,从根本上说,他仍是个未长大的孩子,在顾南风面前,到最后他的手段只剩下无理取闹,她疲惫地闭上眼,心中只余下无可奈何,&ldo;我不明白,也什么都不想明白。我很累,请你离开。&rdo;换来却是他长久得沉默,此夜寂寂无声,原来已是隆冬时节,恍然惊梦。听得见呼吸声,彼此交缠。他不走。她渐渐心生恐惧。最后他说:&ldo;顾小西,我带你走。&rdo;周沐手中握着一只仙鹤独立小瓷瓶,深深望住她,&ldo;鹤顶红,只要一滴而已,没有任何痛苦,小西,小西你乖,听话,喝了它,醒来我们已经回到家中,一切安好,一切安好。&rdo;&ldo;周沐你疯了!&rdo;她挣扎,无奈大病未愈,浑身无力,推搡他如蚍蜉撼大树,自不量力,眼看瓷瓶已到嘴边,她惊惧,眼泪扑簌,&ldo;周沐,不要……求求你,不要杀我……&rdo;而他竟也泪流满面而不自知,颤抖着声线,诱哄似的安慰,&ldo;不怕,小西不要怕,不过一小会,一眨眼功夫就过去,你乖……&rdo;手上动作却不停歇,灌她毒药,取她性命,不,他根本不觉得是在扼杀她的生命。周沐似着了魔,也许他已经恨她入骨,不杀之不足以泄恨。她高呼救命,他却含泪说:&ldo;别再白费力气,皇上今日大婚,人人都进宫去看热闹,此处守卫松散,一个个早已经被我药晕。小西,这世上唯有我最爱你,我又怎么会真的伤害你?&rdo;那液体甜得发腻,最终化作断肠的苦楚,五内俱焚,她仿佛已化作灰烬,她哭着说:&ldo;我好痛……&rdo;
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